Hello New or Returning!

Your visit makes your new support group happy and encouraged! Let’s talk about what addiction is and how it may be impacting your family.

Learning When To Trust Again

Without question trust is an area of our lives that we have to face every day. Whether we are an addict or codependent we all have the same challenge in life, learning how to trust again. Many of us have experienced great betrayal from someone that we love dearly. For the family member or friend of an addict the process of trusting again should be long and slow.

The most common mistake I witness families and/or friends of an addict in recovery make, is they start trusting the addict way too soon.

When we see the drastic change in a person’s life that has begun the road to recovery, we want to reward them as the result of what we are witnessing; it’s only natural. But, in working with addicts over the years I have learned that addicts tend to divert back to what’s comfortable for them during times of difficulty. It was nearly three or four years before my family began to trust me again 29 years ago and I’m so thankful they were patient. I really do not believe I would be here today if they hadn’t been patient. Remember, addicts are not bad people; God loves them just as He loves everyone. Although addicts have a creative gift in manipulating and in most cases without even realizing they are doing it. They can justify and minimize their actions and believe they are doing what God really wants them to do. That is why it is very important to build relationships and allow others to hold us accountable for our actions, whether we are an addict or a codependent, we all need accountability. Together we can help the addict and the codependent grow healthy and be all that God intended us to be in life. I pray for wisdom in your lives dealing with an addict and that God will richly bless you all.

Rev. Timothy Carlsward, C.P.C.

407-468-1200

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